The story of Harilal Gandhi, the eldest son of Mahatma Gandhi and Kasturba Gandhi, is one of the most emotional and painful untold chapters of Indian history. While the world admires Mahatma Gandhi for his leadership, freedom struggle, and moral values, very few know the struggles, heartbreak, and silent suffering endured by his eldest son.
Harilal publicly converted to Islam and named himself "Abdulla Gandhi" in May 1936, at the age of 48. However, later in 1936, on his mother Kasturba Gandhi's request, he converted back to Hinduism through the Arya Samaj and adopted the name Hiralal. Like his father, he also believed in Independence, Equality and good Education.
Harilal was a man of intelligence, ambition, and dreams. Yet his life took a tragic turn due to emotional conflicts, failed expectations, addiction, and the burden of being the son of a national icon. His journey reveals the unseen human struggles behind great historical figures.
Born With Dreams: A Childhood Marked by Responsibility
Born on 23 August 1888, Harilal grew up in a house full of duties and sacrifices. As Gandhi moved deeper into public life, Harilal grew up watching his father dedicate his time to the country rather than his family. This created a silent distance between father and son.
Harilal admired his father deeply but also wanted the freedom to pursue his own dreams. This conflict between admiration and the desire for independence defined his personality from a young age.
The Dream to Study Abroad: A Turning Point
Harilal wanted to study law in England and become a barrister, just like Gandhi. He believed that becoming a lawyer would make him successful, respected, and independent. But Gandhi refused, believing Harilal lacked discipline and might be influenced negatively by Western lifestyle.
This disagreement became the emotional fracture that slowly widened over time. Harilal felt rejected, unwanted, and misunderstood.
Growing Distance: A Father and Son Divided
Gandhi’s commitment to India’s freedom movement meant less time for family. Harilal, meanwhile, struggled for emotional connection and guidance. He joined the freedom struggle, went to jail multiple times, and attempted to follow his father’s ideals, but he still felt overshadowed and invisible.
Society constantly compared him to Gandhi. No matter what Harilal achieved, it was never equal to his father’s greatness. This comparison slowly destroyed him from within.
Family Life and Emotional Burden
Harilal married Gulab Gandhi and had five children. But financial instability and emotional frustration affected the marriage. Despite trying various jobs and starting small businesses, he struggled to achieve stability. His failures made him feel inadequate.
Why Harilal Gandhi Fell Into Alcoholism and Gambling
Harilal’s addiction to alcohol and gambling was not a matter of choice—it was a result of years of emotional trauma, identity crisis, and loneliness.
1. Deep Emotional Rejection
Harilal felt Gandhi did not understand him or support his dreams. This emotional void pushed him into depression.
2. Living in the Shadow of a Mahatma
The pressure of being the son of Mahatma Gandhi made him feel inadequate at every step.
3. Broken Dreams
His dream of becoming a barrister was crushed, which shattered his confidence and sense of purpose.
4. Loneliness and Mental Stress
As he drifted away from his family and father, he sought comfort in alcohol.
5. Failed Attempts at Career and Identity
Every failure pushed him deeper into addiction, making recovery harder each time.
The Conversion to Islam: A Cry for Identity
In 1936, Harilal converted to Islam as “Abdulla Gandhi.” Some historians believe it was a spiritual decision, while others see it as a rebellion against his father. His return to Hinduism later that same year showed his deep internal conflict.
The Final Years: A Life Slipping Away
Harilal’s last years were marked by illness, addiction, financial struggles, and emotional isolation. On 18 June 1948, just four months after Gandhi’s assassination, Harilal Gandhi passed away in Mumbai in tragic conditions.
He died alone, and his body was initially unidentified. The world remained unaware of the suffering endured by the son of a global icon.
Harilal’s Legacy: A Lesson for Every Family
His life teaches us that emotional support is more important than discipline, expectations, or success. Families must listen, understand, and show compassion—because even the strongest hearts can break silently.
FAQs
1. Why did Harilal Gandhi become an alcoholic?
Emotional rejection, unfulfilled ambitions, depression, and the pressure of being Gandhi's son pushed him into addiction.
2. Did Mahatma Gandhi and Harilal reconcile?
Their relationship was strained throughout their lives, with rare moments of peace but no complete reconciliation.
3. Why did Harilal convert to Islam?
He struggled with identity, emotional turmoil, and societal pressure, which led him to seek a new identity.
4. What can we learn from Harilal Gandhi's life?
That emotional support, understanding, and communication within families are crucial for mental well-being.



